So, I’m just supposed to accept this?

Look, if you saw Avengers Infinity War, then I’m sure you’re feeling some kind of way about how everything turned out. In Marvel’s defense, they tried to warn us about the kind of movie we were going to watch when Thor and The Hulk were effortlessly handled by Thanos before the opening credits.

The Bare Bones of the Infinity War Plot

It’s a superhero movie, right? No matter how bleak things seem, it’s always—always going to be O.K. My faith was in that and the scriptwriting formula my professors taught me.

• Act One: Establish the main characters and what they want.
• Act Two: The bad guys (the antagonists) fight the good guys (the protagonists) to prevent each other from getting what they want. There lies the conflict folks, the stuff good movies are made of!
• Act Three: All is LOST! How are the heroes ever going to get what they want? Oh look, they got what they wanted. Yay!
• The End.

Just how well a movie can tell this type of story determines whether it’s good or not.

The Movie Ends. Wait, What the H*ll Just Happened Here?

I’m still trying to figure out how I walked out of the theater feeling defeated, and why suddenly, my Captain America t-shirt didn’t shine like it did when I slipped it on that innocent morning of April 27.

Marvel Avengers Infinity War Writers Flipped the Script On Us!

Here it is: According to my little formula that I’d been taught in college, Marvel literally flipped the script. In the entire Marvel franchise, we have been introduced to all of the Avengers as the protagonist, the heroes. Anyone against them—including Thanos was the antagonist, the bad guy. Since Iron Man debuted in 2008, we have adopted the identity of our beloved Marvel superheroes, for better or for worse. We even started to accept Loki as just the douchebag half-brother who would turn Thanksgiving gatherings into an episode of Cops. The Avengers was a fraternity that the entire world of fan geeks could join.

My nephew is pretty knowledgeable in the comic book world, so when he told me The Avengers would have some problems when Thanos comes, I was just like, “Pssh, they’re The Avengers. They’ll find a way.”

It looks like that quest to find a way is going to take another movie or two.

Marvel Infinity War Writers: You Genius Son of a…Odin!

Here’s why, in spite of the dreaded outcome that was a FREAKING MASSACRE, Avengers Infinity War is still a brilliant movie:

Remember when I said Marvel writers flipped the script? Well, they did! In this installment, the protagonist, like it or not, was Thanos. You don’t have to necessarily have to agree with what he wanted, but the storyline was set from the beginning:

• It’s Act One: His quest was to retrieve all of the Infinity Stones to make the world a better place, all of the main characters have been introduced, or in this case, re-introduced.
• Act Two: The Avengers are the antagonist setting out to do everything to stop Thanos from getting the stones. There’s the conflict.
• Act Three: ALL IS LOST.

Now here, this is where the lines get blurred for me, because at no point can I recall Thanos not being able to achieve his goal. The closest thing occurred in ACT Two when Iron Man, The Guardians, Dr. Strange and Spiderman ambushed him to pry the gauntlet off of his hand. You just knew they weren’t going to be successful because, one, that was too easy, two, it was inevitable Star Lord was going to mess that up, and three, there were way too many unsettled subplots that had to be resolved, like Thor getting his axe, Vision getting surgically separated from the Infinity Stone, and not to mention the whole fight scene in Wakanda that was seen in the trailer. That hadn’t gone down yet.

The Infinity War Wakanda Fight Scene

So, when the Wakanda fighting scene finally did go down, I’m thinking, Hulk’s gonna come out like he did in The Avengers, Thor’s going to bring the axe down, Iron Man’s going to do what Iron Man does and maybe even Vision is going to come in and get a piece of the action like before with Avengers, Age of Ultron.

Nope.

Thanos dealt with each and every last one of The Avengers like a mosquito that just bit him. But there was still Vision’s stone, and while every fan probably wondered how Vision was going to wiggle out of that situation since the start of the promotional trailer, it still was a gut punch to me when Thanos did a remix—brought him back to life after The Scarlet Witch had to kill her newfound love, just to kill him again in the most violent way.

A massacre I tell ya! A freaking massacre!

We still have Thor. Thor’s going to take care of this once and for all—and that sounds about right since he was the first victim of the movie. Also, if it appeared that Thanos was the main story, then it could stand to reason that Thor was the second subplot. Of course, there always has to be some type of love interest, but we already touched on that with the Scarlet Witch and Vision—anyway…

Thor comes in, brings the axe down, and for the most part, it kind of worked. It does neutralize Thanos and if he didn’t have ALL of the Infinity Stones, we could’ve had a different ending—well according to Dr. Strange, maybe not, but we’ll talk about that later.

Thanos said, “You should’ve gone for the head.”

Why, Thor, whyyy didn’t you go for the head?

Damn, damn, damnnnn!

So remember in the trailer when Gamora said Thanos could destroy worlds with the snap of his fingers? Was I the only one who thought that was just a metaphor? I mean, I didn’t know that he could actually DO it at the snap of his fingers. Which one of us can snap our fingers with a gauntlet on? Just saying.

The Avenger Infinity War Death Scene

With all of the carnage going on in the movie, the fading away just didn’t seem so final to me. I mean, Vision fades away all of the time! I didn’t really accept our beloved characters fading way into nothingness as a death. It’s science fiction. I’m waiting for them to reappear!

But that didn’t happen.

They just kept disappearing.

Bucky, The Winter Soldier was the first. I didn’t really care. You’re going to have casualties. Wait, Star Lord…and almost all of the guardians? Really? The Scarlet Witch? Ah, she probably wanted to die anyway. Dr. Strange? Well, it took me a few re-watches to get what he was about. Spidey? Really? You’re going to kill off who was arguably the best Spiderman? He’s one of the reasons Captain America Civil War put a smile on my face. I probably wouldn’t have been so upset if it was Andrew Garfield. The Falcon. The Black Panther. Really? The Black Panther? Your highest grossing superhero. You want to kill T’Challa off? I’m aware of the Black Panther narrative, but  ya’ll didn’t have to do him like that—and his last words, “Today’s not the day to die.” [Sigh]…

The final scene was one neither myself nor probably every other Avenger fan was ready for—the peaceful and satisfying victory sneer of Thanos.

Aw damn. It’s like that?

We lost?

So now what?

Surely. Surely there’s a silver lining at the end of the credits. There always is, right? After all, it’s a Marvel superhero movie. Superheroes always win. That’s why they’re super.

Right?

Sitting through those long-ass credits wondering how everyone could possibly receive a check from this production, I knew that “surprise” scene at the end was going to be the cherry on top of the whole narrative that would have me walking out of the theater feeling like a winner.

But nope. Just more fading away of my boy Nick Fury.

It’s Like That and That’s the Way It Is

There was a bustling hush in the theater as everyone processioned out. The movie patrons thanked us for coming, but their eyes were apologizing for our loss.

The finality of it all left a bitter taste in my mouth, and it wasn’t the stale popcorn with the thin film of cold, butter-like lard either.

The Captain Marvel symbol didn’t make things any better. The fact that Marvel is bringing in a woman superhero should have me almost as excited as the Wonder Woman movie.

But nope.

I can’t even with Captain Marvel right now. I just can’t.

So Now What, Marvel? Now What?

Since they’ve introduced time travel into the franchise, I’m guessing Marvel will be “Pulp Fictioning” us and maybe even incorporate some “Lost” time travel. Dr. Strange was the only superhero who knew what the outcome would be. Before he faded away, he told Tony Stark that it was the only way.

The only way for what? For them to win, right? He had already said out of all of the possible outcomes, there was only one. So there’s that. I know there’s going to be another Spiderman movie and there’s been talk about a Black Widow’s movie since Iron Man 2. Speaking of Black Widow…

 

What’s Up with The Hulk?

We can’t forget to mention the “green elephant” in the room. We only saw the Hulk in very beginning, the Avenger everyone uses as their ace in the pocket. “We got a Hulk.” As said by Tony Stark and Loki (Just realized the irony there. Watch the first Avengers to get what I mean.)

Throughout the entire movie, Banner and the Hulk were fighting with one another, an interesting twist—for once, Banner wanted the Hulk to come out and the Hulk didn’t want to. If that’s not setting us up for a Hulk franchise, I don’t know what is.

Having said that, it’s still doesn’t mend the hole in my Marvel Comic fan heart.

Pour out some liquor.

Marvel Studios, great storytelling. Keep entertaining us. I just want to know one thing: How can I get in on this?

Written by Zorina Frey